Trick or…

Today’s Halloween! A wonderful day to eat candy, admire costumes, and… bitch about the shaft that women are getting when it comes to healthcare premiums?

Okay, guess that you didn’t have that particular goal in mind today. But I do have a rant so I’m going to go there in the spirit of goblins and witches and spirits, oh my. Because what’s Halloween without a good-spirited spook?

I read an article yesterday describing the large disparities in health insurance payments between the genders. In fact, across the board, women are being forced to pay higher premiums, sometimes as much as a third more than men of the same age. The reason why? Insurers say that women use healthcare more, especially during childbearing years. But the rub? Most of these policies don’t cover maternal care and in fact, charge extra for that coverage.

As we grow older, insurance rates tend to rise. Clearly, the majority of older people require more visits to the doctor, more medications and more procedures. But this means that the disparity only continues to grow, even though theoretically, men and women are both using healthcare services, perhaps in equal numbers.

I am not an expert in this area nor do I have any solutions. But I wonder when the gender gap is going to be bridged?

Any thoughts, suggestions or tricks up your sleeve to solve this problem? BTW…this post is cross-posted on Bitchybetty.org, a great site for supporting your rants and bitches. If you haven’t visited BitchyBetty or another fav, Bitchbuzz, do stop by and support those sites!

Wednesday Bubble: Go deeper than the symptom

Too often we find ourselves paying attention to what we want to “do” as opposed to what we want to “be.”  I’m not referring to the smaller “be,” as in, I want to be a ____ when I grow up. But rather, the intrinsic yearning that forms the fabric of our souls and lays the foundation for our footing.

I spoke with the extraordinarily gifted Patti Digh last week to discuss her book, 37 Days, and try to gain some insight into the book’s messages. Patti shared much of the magic behind her words and our conversation was so inspiring and provocative that I have decided to break up the interview into several posts.  Today, I’d love to share with you what Patti said about yearning and how it defines who were are.

So what does Patti mean when she says “go deeper than the symptom?”

“I do a lot of work around story,” explains Patti, adding that author Robert Olin Butler once said that “story is yearning meeting an obstacle.” She describes meeting lots of folks during her book tour and having conversations about what it is that they yearn to do. Not be, but do, the bigger picture if you will. For example, “it’s not so much that I want to open a gift shop,” she says, “but there’s a yearning below that.”

The challenge lies in gaining a larger sense of what the yearning is that is driving the desires and also, what the obstacles are.

When was the last time you stopped yourself from doing something because of lack of money or time or overcommitments? And do you truly believe that these are the real obstacles or is there something larger lurking below the surface that is keeping you from moving forward?

“A lot of times we stay at the surface of things and we don’t go below that to [explore] what’s beneath that, and beneath that, and beneath that,” notes Patti.

In essence, what Patti is describing is the distinction between the self and the soul. Not surprisingly, her book has been described by critics as a “soul-help” book. But what does this truly mean?

“I think that self is a construction of sorts that we learn very early in life to create to protect ourselves, to ingratiate ourselves to others, to play, to perform in the world that we find ourselves living in. So I think that there’s a deeper part of us that is untouched by that and if you can tap into that, you are better able to blossom and hold space for who you are.” Self, on the other hand, is more ego-driven and a barrier to soul and the connections to ourselves and others.

Within each of the book’s six sections are essays, followed by an action step, often a writing exercise, that allows the reader to tap into process of change, and then a movement challenge, which for all intents and purposes, provides a strategy to move abstract thought or change into reality so it becomes a permanent part of your fabric.

Start with “I”

In the second chapter of 37 Days, appropriately named “Start with I,” Patti writes that she stepped back from three years of writing and suddenly “saw patterns of colors, lines, contexts, and meaning that never existed while on the ground.” Perhaps patterns keep emerging because we keep not seeing them, she says. What would happen if you suddenly started to inhabit your life, rather than living right on the surface?

So ask yourself, as Patti did: What is holding you back from fully participating in your own life?  And when was the last time you gave up the”self” to “go below the symptom?”

So today, I am challenging myself to stop waiting for permission, throw away the excuses and start breaking down the barriers that prevent me from defining my yearning and stepping into my full potential. I am going to start by taking care of the “I.”

What about you? Why not try to dip your toes, even if it’s baby steps. Today, go deeper than the symptom.

She works hard for the money

Work’s hard enough without having to worry about menopausal symptoms, right?

A recent survey of 961  busy female executives suggests that in addition to work stressors, a majority (88%) of professional women have personally experienced menopause and a whopping 95% have experienced symptoms. What’s more, 79% report emotional symptoms.

In a nutshell, menopause symptoms significantly affect daily personal, professional and social lives, which is why it is so important that we continue to have open communication and dialogue about this transition in our lives. The thing is, what are employers doing to insure that female workers can continue to be productive AND comfortable? I would suggest that most employers don’t even consider this obvious issue among their workers. And with the health of the current economy, I would also guess that physical health takes a back-seat.

So, when it comes to your work, what can you do to reduce the additional stress and interference brought on by menopause symptoms?

I had the opportunity to interview Author Patti Digh last week about her book, 37 Days. This week I’m going to be writing about what we talked about. Not surprisingly, many of the strategies that Patti discusses correlate to how we can make our lives easier as we grow older, even in the midst of blood, tears and well, sweat!

Meanwhile, I’d love to hear your thoughts. What do YOU do to relieve some of the extra stress brought on by menopause symptoms while you’re at work?

Bad to da bones

Many of us have reached for that third, sometimes fourth glass of wine when out with friends. An occasional trangression never hurts, right?  But for years now, researchers have been warning us to skip those last two glasses. Besides the usual suspects, like breast cancer or stroke, binge drinking (4 or more drinks in a 2 hour period for women, 5 or more for men) can also reduce bone mass and bone strength and consequently, increase the risk for osteoporosis.

Now, for the first time, researchers have identified why binge drinking is bad for da bones – it’s all about genes!

What they found that rats given amounts of alcohol equivalent to binge drinking showed altered expression of two molecular pathways directly responsible for for normal bone metabolism and bone mass. These effects remained even after factors such as body weight or bone mass density were accounted for.

The researchers also found that an anti-bone resorptive agent known as ibandronate was able to correct changes in gene expression., which suggests that alcohol-related bone loss may be correctable. The study was published in the July issue of Alcoholism: Clinical and Experimental Research.

So, why should you care?

As I’ve written before, women undergoing menopause are already at risk for bone loss and osteoporosis. Binge habits may simply exacerbate this process, leading to an even greater risk.

My grandmother always said “everything in moderation.” She lived to be 90 and was still moving furniture around her apartment in her mid-80s.  That lady was bad to the bone, for sure!

Wednesday Bubble: Midlife is not a four-letter word!

“The cultural narrative provided for women at midlife is either medical and menopause oriented — hot flashes, osteoporosis, heart disease, the estrogen replacement therapy decision — or socially devaluing –”empty nest,” a fertility has-been, abandoned for a younger woman, depressed.”

Wow! I read this introduction to a study that was published in the journal Social Work in the late 90’s and it got me thinking: what’s wrong with this picture?

Is midlife truly nature’s death sentence, a curse, a crumbling foundation foretelling a  life well (or not so well) spent? When does this characterization become a self-fulfilling prophecy? And what can we do, as midlifers, to reverse this image? After all, change has to start somewhere, right?

A perfect place to initiate change is from a place within and a place outside of ourselves — by distinguishing ourselves from generations of women who came before us (for whom a self-view was often seen as selfish and whose opportunity to work outside the home was often trumped by the lack of quality positions) — and by asserting and reasserting our identities.

Are these steps in-line with the study findings?

The researchers, who investigated midlife experiences of 103 women between the ages of 40 and 59 reported the following:

• Respondents expressed high degrees of well-being, with 72.5% indicating that they were “very happy” or “happy,” and 64.3%, that this time was “not very confusing” or “not confusing at all.” However, despite being happy, many women still found this time of their lives challenging.

• Women who reported being most satisfied in their lives had a family income of at least $30,000 or more (which in today’s economy, is roughly equivalent to a little over $40,000), had good health, had at least one confidante or group of friends, had a high self-esteem, were not prone to self-denigration, and had a benign super ego.

One particular discovery that I find intriguing was that the groups scoring both the highest and lowest in midlife satisfaction unanimously agreed that what they liked best about midlife was increased independence and freedom, including freedom from worrying what others thought and freedom to develop a self-identity.

Not surprisingly, what women disliked the most about being middle-aged were physical changes, i.e. decreased energy, gray hair, wrinkles and extra weight.

Women scoring the highest in satisfaction and well-being also stated that they disliked the divide between how they saw themselves and how they imagined society saw them (positively and unattractive, respectively).  Also at odds was the fact that they felt that men of the same age were revered for gray hair and wrinkles and did not lose social value in the same way that women did.

So, what are the biggest take-away messages?

• What matters most is not what women have but what they do with it
• Women actively participating in their lives and looking forward to new opportunities were the most satisfied
• Having a social world or at least one confidante with whom to speak freely and honestly about themselves, and feel understood, was critical
• Three selfs were also essential to wellbeing: self-effectance, self-acceptance and self-esteem

I know that certain things have changed since this study was published, such as the fact that research dollars are now being diverted away from simply looking at midlife changes in men and broadly applying the results across the genders,  towards exploring midlife changes and how they specifically affect women’s health. What hasn’t changed, however, is the invisibility factor, that somehow, women over age 40 are no longer relevant.

So this is what I say:

Be relevant. Take the reins and effect change. Take a chance, a plunge. Value yourself. Embrace your friendships and your life. Grieve your former self and celebrate who are you are and who you will become.

Michelle Shocked once wrote “When I grow up, I want to be an old woman.”

When I grow up, I want to be. What about you?

Perfect Sunday…and now for something completely different

Part of the fun of being a blogger is knowing other like-minded souls, like my favorite sister-in-law Blanche. And silly blogger games like “tag.” So, I am writing this in honour of youthful days of yore. (BTW, check out the end of the post for some menopause-related questions.)

Blanche -this one’s for you.

And for you, dear readers who don’t know me personally, here’s a bit of insight into Flashfree.

Instructions:
A) Answer the questions below, do a Google Image search with your answer, take a picture from the first page of results, and do it with minimal words of explanation.
B) Tag 5 other people to do the same once you’ve finished answering every question.

The age you will be on your next birthday

Your favorite place that you want to travel to (I’m interpreting this as my favorite place)

Your favorite Food

Your favorite pet

Your favorite colour combination

Your favorite piece of clothing

First name of your significant other

NA at the moment.

The Town in Which you Live

Bad Habit

Worst Fear

What you’d like to do before you die

I’m breaking the rules. Because I always do. So, I’m only tagging Amy.

This exercise, albeit a bit silly, got me thinking. What are the big questions that would spark some change in ourselves?

1) Thing that disappoints me?

2) Thing that most feeds my soul?

3) One person in the world I know that I can always depend on?

4) One thing I’d do the change the world?

5) Thing that challenges me the most?

Ladies of the world, flashers, sweat-ers, mood swingers…

Lend me your ears….you have your own DAY! In the U.S. we give you a month. But the world gives you a day!

If you don’t know what I’m yammering on about, yesterday was World Menopause Day. I posted this rant over at BitchBuzz after Editor Cate Sevilla sent me a link to a press release announcing that Waterstone Books was carrying the Hot Flush Diary.

Last month was National Menopause Month in the U.S. Now, the ‘world of women in menopause’ actually has a day. I swear if it weren’t abundantly clear that the initiative was likely being driven by national medicine societies and pharmaceutical companies, I’d suspect that Hallmark and PaperHouse had conspired to sell more cards.

Here’s the challenge issued by the International Menopause Society (IMS):

“The World Menopause Day challenge therefore calls on every woman age 45 and older to return to her physician and speak about her individual health history, her risks for diseases, the benefits and risks of available treatments for disease prevention, and steps she can take now to take charge of her health.”

President Hermann Schneider of the IMS also says:

“Due to the recent publications on the risks of long-term use of hormone therapy, many women suffering from menopausal complaints have either dropped out of therapy or haven’t started therapy at all.”

Okay. I truly believe that it’s a great idea to take charge of one’s health and examine some of the natural changes that occur, not only with menopause, but also with aging. But by lumping them all together in a single pot, well, I cry “foul.”

Did you know that many diseases that the medical community has long associated with menopause are, in fact, due to the aging process? You may recall that I recently wrote about a new study published in the Journal of Hypertension clearly demonstrates that differences in heart disease risk between pre- and post-menopausal women with similar risk profiles existed only when age, NOT ESTROGEN LEVELS, were accounted for. This may be why hormone replacement therapy (HRT) has not been proven to prevent heart disease.

So, until they sort some of these bits out, do we really want to fault women for refusing hormone replacement? Moreover, how many women wish to make a pact with the devil to further the medicalization of menopause? Not I!

Here’s what I propose:

• To the IMS and other medical societies – stop medicalizing what is a natural transition in our mid-lives. Hey, here’s a nifty idea: why not review your data, read alternative medicine peer-reviewed journals and educate yourselves about effective alternative therapies for your patients who have been scared off by the negative findings surrounding HRT and antidepressants and other pharmaceuticals? What’s more, what if you made a greater effort to embrace multidisciplinary collaboration and invite educated and credentialed alternative practitioners into your fold, practitioners who might be able to offer you and your patients important solutions when Western ways fail or are simply, impractical?
• To the World Health Organization – please stop telling us to celebrate the menopause. Trust me – when women are flashing in the middle of a meeting, sweat pouring down their faces as their colleagues look on, or are sleeping on soaking wet sheets because of night sweats, well, they don’t really feel like having a cocktail and a “WOOT,” ain’t life grand”-sort of celebration. Maybe, instead, think about devoting some of that hard research cash toward studies that focus first on women and last on profit.
• To leading women’s health expert and Council Member of the British Menopause Society, Mr. Nick Panay, a Hot Flush Diary is the last thing I want to keep on my nightstand. In fact, the idea of taking notes on all of my hot flashes and night sweats and when/why/how they occur and how they make feel gets me pretty hot under the collar. Tell you what: the next time you have to pee for the zillionth time in the middle of the night, turn on the light and write in your BPH journal how you feel. I would guess that that’s not going to happen, right?

Want to “make this hot woman cool?” Stop making me feel as though menopause is a disease and not a natural transition that all women go through. Stop telling me that I should embrace this part of my life without fighting it every step of the way. And please, stop treating my body as if it’s disconnected from my mind.

Hope springs eternal: black cohosh

There may be good news on the horizon for perimenopausal women with hormone receptor-positive breast cancer.  Researchers from the University of Missouri-Columbia are conducting an animal study to see how black cohosh and the tamoxifen interact.

Unfortunately, breast cancer patients who take tamoxifen to prevent their cancer from recurring, are unable to take hormones for menopausal symptoms that often occur as the drug starts working to shut down estrogen production. Consequently, one of the only options available to them are antidepressants, which are not always effective and depending on the agent, may cause side effects such as weight gain, fatigue or reduced sexual desire.

It’s a hopeful path that may help alleviate undesired side effects in women with breast cancer. If you’re interesting in reading more about black cohosh, you can click on the word in the tags category on the sidebar.

Irritable Male Syndrome

[Marianna Schmidt, Angry Man, 1986]

We now interrupt our regularly scheduled program to….

Turns out that your angry male partner/friend/husband is not in male menopause afterall. At least according to psychotherapist Jed Diamond, whose book, ‘Male Menopause’ caused quite a stir when it was first published in 1998.

So, is your guy suffering from IMS?

IMS is a term used to describe a state in which men of any age become hypersensitive and angry, theoretically as a result of biochemical changes, hormone fluctuations (namely testosterone), stress, and sense of loss of male identity.  With regards to hormone fluctuations specifically, Dr. Diamond explains in an interview featured on WebMD, that:

• testosterone levels can increase and decrease as many as five times an hour
• testosterone levels are higher in the morning and lower at night
• men have monthly cycles that vary from man to man but are trackable using mood changes as a guide
• between the ages of 40 and 55, men go through male andropause syndrome, with declining androgen levels that affect sexual desire, function and overall quality of health. Notably, some research suggests that this is debatable).

IMS evidently rears its head as depression or worse, anger, hostility and violence directed towards another person.  And Dr. Diamond says that until men overcome their denial and attributing their feelings to outside causes, they can’t overcome the problem.

I did a quick search on PubMed to see if any of Dr. Diamond’s research has been published. I didn’t find anything. However, I did stumble across his website, where he encourages guys to take a quiz to determine if they’re suffering from IMS, and women, to sign up for an interactive program called “AliveGuide.”

IMS…is it real? Or simply another way to sell books? What’s more, what can your guy do about it? Dr. Diamond recommends recognition and communication, among other self-help steps.

What do you think?  Men – are you suffering from IMS or know someone who is? What steps are you taking to help yourself? Women – does your guy/friend/partner have IMS?

I’d love to hear more!

Wednesday Bubble: Blue

Mid-life depression is a real issue. But are your blue feelings due to depression or to menopause? That is, is depressed mood in middle aged women a result of aging and some of the emotional or pyschological factors that accompanies it, or due to hormonal changes during the transition?

Experts still are not certain of the association and to date, research has demonstrated contradictory results, with some studies showing a correlation between depression and menopause and others, none. Other studies suggest mood declines during early stages of menopause followed by improvements as vasomotor and other symptoms start to wane.

However, what the data do appear to show is that there are several time periods in a woman’s life in which she is more vulnerable to depressive symptoms, e.g., pre-menstruation, postpartum and of course, during the menopausal transition.  What’s more, data from the Melbourne Women’s Mid-Life suggest that a prior history of depression and having negative feelings about menopause can increase risk. Additionally, menopausal-onset depression and the start of vasomotor symptoms during the early stages of menopause appear to be linked.

Personally, I believe that drastic changes in one’s body, in moods and appearance, as well as some serious self-exploration and self-analysis, also play a role.

So, what can you do when you feel blue?

Transdermal estrogen delivered via a patch that is applied to the skin appears to even out estrogen fluctuations that may affect mood during the menopause. For women for whom estrogen is not an option and who are not interested in trying antidepressants, (whose effects, btw, may vary depending on age), St. John’s Wort (hypericum) extract may be a viable and effective option. A recent analysis of 29 studies enrolling almost 5,500 patients showed that St. John’s Wort extract:

• is superior to placebo tablets in patients with major depression
• is as effective as standard antidepressants
• has fewer side effects than standard antidepressants

So, how should you take St. John’s Wort? Well, like any herb, it’s best to consult with a practitioner well-versed in herbal therapy rather than reaching for a bottle in your local drugstore. Many therapists are also joining the band wagon and may be able to provide advice.

In earlier posts, I wrote how exercise can help to improve mood symptoms. And ironically, a glass of red wine daily also has been shown to improve mood and quality of life, although if you’re taking medications for depression, alcohol is counterintuitive.

So, tell me? Are you feeling blue on a more regular basis? What seems to help (or not help)?